He Never Leave You

Come to me, all you who are weary and burdened, and I will give you rest. - Matthew 11:28

Have you ever feel regrets, bad-mood, alone, angry, not cared by the others, negative-thinking, and all bad-feels? And they come to you one by one until you think to do something really bad (something that contrary to conscience)? Yes, I have!

I had a lot of problems since 6 months ago. Because of someone who just played with my feelings for one year, I became sad, angry, and not excited to do my activities. Plus my work & college were so busy, lived alone at dorm (because I was a clerkship, so I must lived nomadic and be separated with my bestfriends), pressure from bosses, etc. At that condition, the negative-thinks came to my mind. I became labile and hard to express my feelings to other (one of my friend told this). The results? I became a introvert in my surroundings. I cried without causes frequently (more emotional---whereas I was a ignorant-person before). 

I ever think to end my life, but my logic and conscience still work. Jesus gave His hand to pull me back to Father's way. He called me to the church so I met a clergy. The clergy listened to my long-long-long stories patiently. After that, he gave me a lot of advice. Through him, Jesus said that if I want to forgive by Father, I must forgive the person who hurt me first; he knew it was really hard (for example, you couldn't hide the nail holes although you pulled out the nails). He wanted me to forgave that person because everyone had pasts (good or bad). Let God determines whether he/she'll be punished or not, and the kind of punishment (for whatsoever a man soweth, that shall he also reap - Galatians 6:7) 

Which I want to focus here is, Jesus/Father/Holy Family are never leave the people who need help, who still have a faith in Him, who still hope in Him. He never let his sheep lost, because He was the only true-shepherd. (“I am the good shepherd; I know my sheep and my sheep know me—15 just as the Father knows me and I know the Father—and I lay down my life for the sheep. -- John 10:14-15)